iattractmushi | ❦ 19th Record

[He's silent for a time, rolling up bandages and wrestling with his emotions. Finally, just as he's finishing the last one, he mutters,] That's... good, at least. [At least they had people who could treat the injured. He doesn't have to feel guilty about not being here... or at least, not too guilty.]

[He gathers up the neatly rolled-up bandages into a basket.] You're holding up alright?

[She sighs softly, and then gives him a small smile.]

As well as can be expected. A little frustrated, perhaps.

[His glance drops to her injured shoulder. Frustrated because she got hurt, or because it stopped her from carrying out her duties normally? Not that it mattered which it was, really...

The smile prompts his face into... well, not a smile, not exactly. But the veiled turmoil on his face eases. He looks calm again, at least on the surface. Putting the basket aside, he starts to neaten up some towels that are lying nearby.] That's good.

[He glances at her again out of the corner of his eye, thinking. He could end the conversation here, or... ah, hell. He enjoys her company, and it's been a while since they had a chance to really talk to each other.] How've you been other than that? Been a while since we had the chance to talk.

[She pauses, thinking back. It has been a while. She had meant to speak with him after her time on the fourth floor - but then Pollux had disappeared, and then the zombies had come, and...there had never been time. There wasn't really time now, but with everything that had been happening lately, she wasn't certain there would ever be time before it was too late]

...How well did you know Koi?

Koi? [He looks away from the towels, his face blank with surprise. A hesitation before he speaks, to gather his thoughts.] ...not that well, I guess. He worked at the tea shop, had a lot of friends he worried about. [He pauses again, rubbing his chin with one hand thoughtfully.] He seemed to be a kind and gentle man, but we really only talked once.

[She nods slightly] As did I.

When I was trapped on the fourth floor, I had a memory. He was in it, along with another man who was here only briefly - Breeze. They were... young. Younger than I was.

[He blinks a little. Koi struck him as being much older than Bellflower, now that he's thinking about it; but if she saw them in a memory as being younger than she was... he decides avoid the topic of her age. Some women seem to be touchy about that kind of thing.]

They were from your world. [What must that be like?

...as curious as he is, he hopes the smiling woman from his memory never shows up. She's better off in their original world, he's sure.

Curiosity about something else prompts his next question.] What were you doing in your memory?

[A small nod at his statement. She had known about Koi, and perhaps... those feelings of familiarity with Breeze. But it still hadn't meant she expected what she had seen.]

I was watching them practice swordplay. I had a blade of my own, next to me - one the Sphere saw fit to return to me temporarily this month.

[His gaze flicks to her shoulder again, at the reminder of what they all just went through, but that's the only reaction he has this time. He tucks his hands into his pockets, for lack of anything better to do with them.]

Hnnn... so you can fight? [That's something of a comfort, at least--she isn't defenseless.]

[A nod] I had the sense of that before, but that memory - and the attacks - cemented that knowledge.

[She sighs, glancing down]

It feels....strange. To know that someone was important to me before this place, and to never get a chance to discuss it with them.

[He gets the feeling she just wants to talk about this, that it doesn't really matter what he says. So he leans back against a convenient wall, and nods a little. Instincts. It's all they have here, instincts reaffirmed by the occasional memory, if they're really lucky.]

...maybe he'll come back someday. [Or you'll leave too...] At least you know about the connection now.

[She glances back up, meeting his eyes] True. Still - there are so many uncertainties in this place. How long must someone be dead for before we mourn?

[He flinches a little at that, looking away from her. He bites back his initial protest--we don't know that for sure!--reminding himself that... well, they've both died. So what's to stop this from being some kind of fucked-up afterlife? Since none of them remember their former lives, they could well all be dead.

...if that's the case, what happens when people leave the afterlife? Do they just... cease to be? But if that's true, then Pollux...

Damn, but he's in a depressing mood. He glances back up at her, trying to mentally shake off the train of thought.] ...everything about this place is uncertain. There's no guarantee of anything here, not even that we'll be here tomorrow. And the dead don't stay that way. [They're living proof of that, after all.]

All we can do is move forward, even if it's just one step at a time. [It's the best piece of advice he's gotten in this place, and it's easy enough to pass on.]

[She takes a somewhat shaky breath, trying to calm herself, and then gives him a small, sad smile.]

You are right. It is difficult not to get wrapped up in 'what if's, but it does no good.

[He returns the smile, trying to put a little more warmth in it than he might otherwise, in response to the sadness.

...under normal circumstances, he'd probably try to change the subject right now. As it is...] Just... try not to dwell on it too much, hmm? This place creates enough problems for us as it is...

[She tries for a warmer smile, to match his - it's a little forced, but it helps]

I...will do my best. Thank you.

Sure. [He pushes off the wall, scooping up the bandages.] I'd better put these away... Mindalen is going to wonder if I forgot about her. Need me to take anything else back before I go?

[She shakes her head slightly]

No, I believe that was all.

[Pause, and then she reaches out with her free hand and gives his shoulder a little squeeze]

I am glad to have you back.

[He pauses as she reaches for him, letting her grip his shoulder. He's still not quite sure why everyone else seems to find touching to be... soothing? Comforting, at least.

But he doesn't mind it from her. He reaches up to kind of pat her hand a little awkwardly, hoping that action conveys his gratitude.] Thanks. It's... good to be back.

[It's even the truth, which is less surprising than it maybe should be.]

❦ 19th Record

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject